How Well Do My Friends and Family Follow Directions?

March 15, 2010 at 10:45 pm | Posted in My Pig Collection, Pig Gift Ideas | 4 Comments
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In 2009 I created my first Online Pig Gift Guide. It was a joy to put together, because it helped me absorb the sensational pig finds, without actually having to own them, thus keeping the chaos of clutter at bay. An excerpt from the guide stipulated:

Despite constantly reminding friends and loved ones that I am not actively seeking to add to my overly abundant pig collection, I receive numerous pig related gifts each holiday. The caveat I’ve placed on receiving pig gifts is this: if it has a practical use or is a vintage find with lots of character, I’m willing to make exceptions:)

So did friends and family adhere to the aforementioned ground rules? As my pig blog readership grows (to a whopping 10 people and counting) I figured you, my loyal readers, deserved to know. So here goes:

During the 2009 holiday season I received the following items from friends and family:

  1. 1 Pig Hat, wool with fleece lining (that’s me above sporting it; I can relate to The Christmas Story scene when the kid wears the bunny suit)
  2. 1 Pig Steamer that fits on top of pots to let steam out (through the 2 pig nostrils, of course)
  3. Porkchops (they’re punny chopsticks with pigs on them)
  4. A pig t-shirt (extra points for organic cotton and local artist-designed)
  5. Pig Cutting Board (made of a sustainable wood = a definite plus)
  6. A Vintage Pig Figurine (love it!)
  7. A farmer pig decorative item from a local second-hand shop (2nd hand shop items=cool, less crap being added to the world)
  8. A pig ice-cream scooper (my second one, shhh!)
  9. A pig umbrella (garners much attention on the streets of San Francisco)
  10. Reusable pig shopping tote bag (I use this bag almost every day when I go to the produce market)
  11. Book The Whole Hog: Exploring the Extraordinary Potential of Pigs by Lyall Watson. This was actually his last published book, according to Wikipedia. R.I.P. Lyall!

Did these gifts meet the criteria set forth in the original blog post? You be the judge.

Do you see now why I have more pigs in my life than I know what to do with? I’m almost 40. That’s 40 birthdays, 40 holidays, and 40 National Pig Days x 11 pig gifts. You do the math.

The word gluttonous comes to mind. Pigs are not gluttonous, G-d no. I’m talking about myself. One definition of gluttonous: greedy; insatiable.

Ahhh, yes. Insatiable. That is the word I would use to describe my pig habit. No quantity of socially responsible-made pig products and vintage finds will fill me up. It’s an appetite that never goes away.



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  1. WE think Miss Piggy, aka Rebecca, has lost her memory because a pig lover never forgets(or was that elephant) her gifts, but we did give her a practical pig gift for practical use which was a very pink pig soap on a rope. WE presented this piglet to her when she was pigging out at a fantastic chinese buffet which was actually during the chinese year of the pig. Now this 40 year old pig should put her tail between her legs and pig for an apology. WE could forgive you except we did not know about your pig post or pig requirements. But we are happy to know that you have matured into post pig sobriety. Lots of hogs and kisses from your favorite Cromwell relatives who oink you very much

    • Ooooh, you got me! I completely forgot the pig soap on a rope, my bad:) I’m sure there are others I forgot as well. It’s just so hard to remember all the piggies:)

  2. I have only one comment about whether her friends and family follow directions:
    Only she who attempts the absurd can achieve the impossible….
    Sharon Schuster.

    I leave it to you to decide: is the absurd finding the perfect pig gift, or refraining from buying one you just “know she’ll love” even though not vintage, etc.

    Her Mother, trained for 35 years to scan for pig gifts.
    PS I did not knit the hat.

  3. As the creater of the very first Miss Piggy sweatshirt, written in French no less (called the French Embassy to ask how to spell Miss Piggy in French — the woman thought I was nuts — but suggested something I can’t remember. I believe that one-of-a-kind sweatshirt was worn for many, many years) Does that count as practical? If yes, perhaps I can then be forgiven for not being able to pass up anything piggy without a smile and a thought of you — and occasionally a purchase!

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